Tuesday, October 2, 2012

My two selves...

Do you ever get the feeling that you have 2 distinct personalities; one for the morning and one for the evening?  Now, before you start backing up and thinking, "Alrighty, Mel's gone all 'Cybill' on us, time to call the Paddywagon and haul her off," know that I'm OK and just on the right side of the scale from normal to crazy that I should be, but...
I definitely find myself thinking thoughts in the morning that I would slap myself for in the afternoon.  Like, "Hey, that load of laundry doesn't need folded right now.  Why rush now when you'll have 2 hours this evening to do it after the kids to bed." Meanwhile, 8 hours later, my brain is saying, "What the HELL was I thinking??!  Oh well, it'll wait till tomorrow morning," leading to the inevitable moment three days later when none of my family members can find their underwear or clean clothes because they're all in a pile in the corner of my room waiting to be folded.  Or, heaven forbid, still soaking wet and growing lovely cultures of mildew in my washing machine.  You know you've done it- no judging!
Another example: this morning was the weekly mad dash to get ready for co-op that confirms my every notion that I would make a sucky public school mom.  I am not cut out for packing lunches, making sure we all get out of our jammies, brushing people's hair, and otherwise making sure that we are presentable human beings before 9 a.m.  In fact, most days I don't manage to get out of my own jammies until the last possible moment before my husband gets home (so I can carry on the illusion that his wife looked lovely and well-put-together all throughout the day... BWAHAAHAHHA! Not!).  So this morning I had a bit of a hissy fit when, for the fourth week in a row, I had to wait on my children to find their preferred shoes and redirect them when they chose the trashiest ones they own, and then redirect them again to put on those trashy shoes because we cannot find their good shoes in the big horrible mess we call a coat closet.   Last week Sarah actually had a blowout for her trashy shoes and they literally FELL APART while in school, causing her to have to run around barefoot through the day.  This week, it was Sarah again sitting in front of the shoe closet door fretting about which shoes to wear while I sat trying to wedge the door open with about 5 thousand little school things hanging off various parts of my body and trying to balance the keys just right to hit the fob for my other kids, who were trying to scale the van out of sheer boredom because of the whole three minutes they had to wait for us to get out to the van to meet them.  Aaaaannnd that is where I hit my tipping point into the bad side of crazy.  I threw down my school things, popped the van door for Hannah and Caleb to get them to stop climbing my van ("Dear Lord, please protect them from learning to work the shifter while I'm busy inside"), and proceeded to throw every last shoe out of the closet onto the floor, vowing that this afternoon I would organize the whole thing and make it work better for us.  This is the result:
And that's what we came home to, 6 hours and 4 classes later.  My afternoon self is now cursing my morning self with its usual, "What the HELL were you thinking??!"   6 hours later I have no energy and 3 kids bursting at the seems with energy, inside, on a rainy day.  6 hours later I still have to make dinner, put away our school supplies, clean up the kitchen, and "oh, hey, by the way, why don't you consider blogging about your troubles instead of doing something productive about it, Mel?"   Yep.  My afternoon self is not liking my morning self so much right now.  And my afternoon self might not get around to addressing this mess until about 5 minutes before Ryan comes home.  Because my afternoon self would like to make sure my evening self is just as pissed off as my afternoon self is right now, I guess.  And so the cycle continues...

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