2. Where's my breakfast/lunch/dinner/snack?
3. Do I have to?
4. Are you eating MORE chocolate/drinking A-NOTHER cup of coffee?!
"Just throw her some Ben and Jerry's and hide until she's done"
5. Are you in PMS? (For Ryan)
Are you crazy? Do you poke the guy in the insane asylum and ask him if he's lost his marbles? Do you ask the inmates at San Quentin what they did to land themselves in prison? NO! Neither do you ever, e-v-e-r ask this question. Firstly because, duh, I'm going to flatly deny it. Secondly because, if I am, you just acknowledged that you have been observing MY behaviour instead of looking deep into your heart and thinking of the many wonderful ways you can show ME how much you love and adore me at this trying time. Think of how you would nurture a sick person... wait, no... you suck at that... think of how you'd treat your Mom if she was sick, and then act like that. Bring me food, let me watch t.v. and otherwise keep your distance unless summoned.
I'm sure at some point I'll have more to add to this list, but it's helpful to remember at this point that I love my family very much and will return to being my sweet and loving self in a short 7 days (or sometimes, luckily, less). I apologize for the bad behaviour in advance, and send hugs and kisses. I know it's tough for you guys, but I promise to feel nicer soon. In the mean time, can you stop chewing so loudly?!