Thursday, February 3, 2011

Things I've noticed:

Since being stuck inside for our customary month-long winter illness stent, I've noticed a few things about my kids....

Sarah- the child is becoming more and more like the absentminded professor every day. She asks the most profound questions, like "Mommy, how does a car engine work?" or "Mommy, Why does God let little kids get sick sometimes?" and she can build huge elaborate mechanical structures with pillows and tinkertoys (MacGyver much?), but then you look at the child... she CAN NOT dress herself. I swear that on any given day at least one item of clothing on her will be backwards and she does. not. care. It's hilarious. I'll yell, "Sarah, didn't you notice your underpants are on backwards?" "No, they're not bothering me!" "But they're riding so high up your bottom I think they're gonna cut you in half soon, and that didn't occur to you?" "Nope" "Change 'em. Now." "Aw Mom!" And don't get me started on her ability to match clothing. I'm no fashionista myself... ask my mother who routinely re-dresses me when I come to her house. But this child will put a lime colored leopard print sweater with a pair of baby blue sweat pants and purple polka dot socks and think nothing of it. I seriously see her giving her dissertation someday in a red velour jumpsuit with a big green flowered headband and mismatched blue and yellow clogs on the wrong feet!

Then theres the falling. The child falls about 70 million times a day, with no discernable cause!!! She's just walking, walking, walking, and oops! and now she's down again. No cause for alarm, I've sorta ruled out all the scary medical/physical reasons and decided it's genetics. I myself have a tendency to walk into poles, walls, small children, etc. on a regular basis, but this child takes the cake. I've bought her sticky bottom socks and she still manages to bite it, in ever new and creative ways.

"I'm inventing a way to keep your child's feet from sliding all over the place... it involves hairspray and a tampon applicator...don't ask."

Caleb- the boy is destined to have Mommy-issues. He and I are stuck to each other like glue. He is my squishy, and he shall be mine always and forever. Watch out future wives, this kid only has eyes for Mommy. Seriously, at random moments throughout the day, he'll just wander over and say, "Mommy, I hug you?" The only person in creation to capture his attention away from Mommy is Dino Dan, and I'm pretty sure he's got Mommy-issues too, so it may be a kinship thing.

He also has a memory like a sieve. It only holds what he has chosen for it to trap. Ask the boy a question about fire trucks, and he can answer it. Ask him to name the parts of a bulldozer (who knew there was a part called a ripper on the back that breaks up rocks? My kid, that's who), and he's your man. But teach him a color, number, letter, or shape, and he'll repeat it back once, then the information falls right outta his brain. I taught the boy "B" three weeks ago, and now every single question I ask about a color, number, or shape is answered with "B!" And we're not talking about a little effort on my part. Whenever we read books, play in the tub, playing games, etc. I'm describing shapes, colors, numbers, letters, but for some reason, the facts just don't stick. I would worry that he has the IQ of a stump, but he can dream up fantastically creative ways to torture his sisters covertly and can name dinosaurs on sight (on t.v. I mean :)), so maybe I just suck as a teacher.

Hannah- The kid could rule the world if I could just find a cure for her laziness. She has mad fashion sense, and barely after her eyes have opened for the day she's already planning her outfit, hair, and accessories. She hits the ground running, quick to get dressed, making Sarah and I look like the indoor homeless shelter people she lives with (Sarah and I would live in mismatched Jammies if we could), but once she's lookin' fierce, I think her energy for the rest of the day is sapped. Chores and bed-making are like pulling teeth with her, and don't get me started on school work that doesn't immediately catch her interest... I think she'd set fire to me with her eyes if I didn't include craft/artwork in our school day every day. She's destined to be either an art-eest or the next (white) Tyra Banks with her stubborness, creativity, and social personality...if she can just find the motivation to get beyond the first 20 minutes of the morning and keep going.

"Hannah, you're cute and fiesty like me... if you'd just stay awake...hello? are you listening?! Gah!"

Although... I've also found the one source of exercise the child will willingly participate in. I got the kids free hoola hoops at the homeschool store last week and she has been hoola-hooping herself about. to. death. ever since they've gotten them in the house. Which is surprising given her little Buddha belly. My baby-girl has no waist whatsoever, and yet by sheer will and centrifugal force, she hoola's till she practically drops. Yay, hoola hoops!

I just wonder what kinda dirty little secrets they know about me after these last few weeks of close quarters contact...
"Hey Daddy, did you know...."
you don't think I'd put that kinda stuff out there on this blog do you? I'll wait for them to blurt it out in public at the worst possible moment instead ;)

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